This time, 2 years ago, I was getting ready for a routine 16 week appointment with my OB. Later that day we would find out that our baby’s heart had stopped beating. Their best guess was that it happened just a few days before.
Since that day, there has been pain, sadness, happiness, joy, death, life, loss, and growth. Life moves on, even in the face of tragedy.
I have written a lot about Lilia, and I’m grateful to have been able to process my grief through words. I’m grateful to so many of you for letting me speak, for talking to me about her, for grieving with me. Someone recently told me they thought I was acting like a victim for posting about her.
Let me be clear.
I am not ‘acting like a victim’.
I am a grieving mother, who lost her daughter.
And here is what I know from the last 2 years. Many of you have also lost daughters and sons. Some of you may lose a child in the future. I’m not trying to be morbid, but the American Pregnancy Association says that the risk of miscarriage, on average, is about 20-30%.
I know that miscarriage and pregnancy/baby loss is a lonely and dark place.
I know that using my voice from this experience has helped other women, because they’ve told me so. I know that I personally found healing through the voices of other women who shared their experiences.
Today, in honor and celebration of Lilia I will be donating my wedding gown to be used to make burial gowns for tiny babies who leave this earth too soon. If you know someone who has been impacted by the loss of a child, consider donating either your wedding gown, your money (just $10 can make a gown!), or your talents as a seamstress to NICU Helping Hands Angel Gowns program.
And to those of you who allow me to honor my daughter through written word or conversation, thank you. From the bottom of my heart.
Also grateful to Amanda from Joy Ever After for photographing various stages of pregnancy with the fruit that correlates to the size of the baby.
We love and miss you Lilia Faith!